Thursday, January 29, 2015

Yet Another Statistic

Another day, another veteran death on record. What is wrong with this picture? So the VA can add this to the list of those veterans who take too many prescribed drugs. Just another statistic to them. What do they do when vets need help on their road to recovery? I wrote about it in my previous blog. They give them counseling and classes and support, along with filling them with prescription drugs.

It is not only the VA. It is the modern medical answer to everyone for every ailment....drugs for this and drugs for that. Drugs seem to be the answer. Not that meds cannot help. They do help some with issues. But for many, more is not the only answer. Quick fixes, instant cures......what have we become in this world of healing?

He was a teacher, a trainer, a friend. He was loving, caring and helpful to others, but he could not help himself. He was afflicted with PTSD, addictions to drugs, anxiety, sleep deprivation, migraines and brain trauma. His pain increased, along with the meds. He lived alone, with minimal monitoring of his numerous drugs. We watched his decline and did what we could, but it was not enough. His world closed in around him, shutting him off from those who cared for him. How could anyone understand that world of extremes.....extremes of pain, isolation and loneliness.

Some of us believed that we, his clients and friends, helped him by following his example and training. He told us that we inspired him. Maybe we did, but, in the end, it was not enough. It was just not enough.....

He shared with me that the counseling he received from the VA became less frequent.  There had been cut backs on personnel. But the prescribed drugs increased. The correlation was skewed. I remember encouraging him to get back to the doctor. He felt that the doctor was not as available as before. He had seen him on a weekly basis previously but those appointments became farther apart. The drugs seemed to be messing him up. Changes to his drugs, along with regular support, seemed to be in order, especially for someone who lived alone. His nights were the hardest. Sleep became almost impossible.

His death certificate states "suicide" as the cause of death. Age 42.

We cannot accept that word that marks his end. Yes, he overdosed on his prescription drugs. He took far too many, but he had far too much pain. Who can judge as to how many of us with so many burdens would not take more and more of doctor prescribed pain relievers to bring relief to our exhausted bodies and minds?

Ah, blessed relief! He has found it at last.

Saturday, January 24, 2015

Sweat and Tears

We sat side by side, sweating in the sauna.

"I really want to get off of meds. I got back from Afghanistan and nothing fits. My wife no longer understands me. I came here to the VA to get help with my issues she doesn't understand, and they put me on more meds. I really love coming here to the Plunge. I can work out upstairs, in the water and then relax in the health club. I come here everyday. I want to get off of my meds and use the natural things to help my nerves and nightmares."

He talked rapidly, barely pausing for a breath or a response from me. Finally he paused and looked over at me, as if waiting for a reaction to his litany.

"Have your tried acupuncture or yoga?" I asked him. "Both of those services are offered here in town."

"I want to try both of those. I want to try every thing the natural way and get off of all those medications."

With those words he bounced off of the bench and disappeared out the door. His friend from the domiciliary was sitting across the sauna. He now had his chance to talk and he told me that he had come for treatment from Denver.

"I really love this VA and this town. I want to move here some day and make this my home", he told me. "It is easier to manage my issues in this peaceful community."

Two other veterans from the Dom came into the sauna. All four of them came to the Plunge every day.  They were all delighted with the amenities that our Plunge had to offer. They loved to let off steam with exercise, water, hot tubs and the steam. All four wanted to try natural means for healing instead of the artificial drugs which offered temporary relief and maybe, just maybe, added addictions.

All four were struggling to find their way back to society, back to their families, back to work. For now they felt safe within the VA system, but they also knew it was a temporary haven and they all echoed that they wanted to find their way back to "normal", whatever that was. So much had changed for them during their years in the service. They were different somehow and civilian life seemed confusing and unwelcoming.

"We used alcohol and drugs to soothe our anxieties. We just added another problem to our emotional ones. Now we have to deal with both."

I was happy that they found some part of "normal" while making use of the Plunge. I watched them join in with other townspeople in water volleyball and basketball. Looking on I would never have guessed that they were struggling with PTSD and substance abuse issues.

I doubt is any of us have reached perfect "normal" during our lifetimes. Perhaps it is best that we haven't. We all have our dark sides to battle at times. For me it helps in understanding those four veterans desperate to find some normalcy. I know of no one who has attained perfection. And, I believe that is what makes all of us interesting. Flaws weave a pattern of richness into a tapestry of humanness.  I wish, with all my being, that in some small way these veterans find some peace in their present lengthy conflict, a struggle that is possibly more difficult than the battle they fought overseas.

When I left the Health Club at the Plunge all four veterans were soaking, laughing and talking in the hot tub. They all looked relaxed and like the usual tourists. "What a nice old lady", one of them said as I waved goodbye.

Welcome home, guys.

Sunday, January 18, 2015

The Joys of Small Town Living

You have heard them before: less crime, less traffic, less pollution. These are some of the parts of small towns that many enjoy. Oh, yes, we gave up terrific theater, multiple restaurants, extensive shopping, etc. when we retired to the rural area. There are pluses and minuses to both the life of congestion and the one of open spaces. As for me, I am contented that I experienced both types in my lifetime.

In retirement, I am pleased that I am living with fewer people, in a quieter venue. Now, instead of the previously mentioned enticements of the small town, I am suggestion a few that may not have entered your consciousness:

What about the ease of locating your car in the parking lot of the grocery store? You don't have to remember the number of the row in which you parked and wander around for 15 minutes trying to locate your car.

If push comes to shove, all necessary shopping is within walking distance. Even the medical facilities are within a short taxi ride or a hitch with a neighbor or friend.

Each stop for shopping, post office, city hall, court house or city pool is a social event. I can count on one hand the times that I did not run into someone and had a pleasant visit. The most heated and lengthy discussions usually occur in the Plunge pool, steam room or sauna.

Cars often stop for you when you are trying to cross the street, and not just at the corner required stops.

There is only one stop light in the downtown.

The nights are quiet, with the exception of the fourth of July weeks, but most of us are happy to be immersed in the peacefulness after a full day of conversations with most folks we know, and at times, some we don't.

Neighbors know one another and watch out for each other. Doors are seldom locked because many eyes keep a watch on nearby houses. (Just don't forget to tell the neighbor when a friend may stop over to use your oven while you are gone.)

It took me a few years to adjust to the fact that meeting a deadline on the other end of town did not take 30 or more minutes. Even in Rapid City to our north I could make a doctor's appointment across town in ten minutes.

Forget a credit card or your phone on the counter? Not to worry. You will get a phone call very soon.

Where else do teenagers hold the door for you and wait for you to enter?

Six chickens are allowed in the back yard - a yard which becomes bug free and richly fertilized. Super enriched tasty eggs are shared with neighbors.

No matter the restaurant, you usually run into someone you know. Hugs are freely given.

As a taxpayer, your voice is heard (and at times heeded) at council and commission meetings.

As the old saying goes, "The best part of small town living is that everyone knows you. The worst part is that everyone knows you."

Each person must choose for him or herself...anonymity in a city, or familiarity in the small town.
Bob and I have chosen the first for our career years and the latter during retirement. We have had the best and the worst of each world. Works for us!


Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Final Roll Call

"Well, this is different", my husband said to the mortician as we walked into the American Legion.

We went to the wake of Richard Galeano which had been moved from the funeral home to the American Legion down the block. We entered a room filled with Native Americans, most from the Pine Ridge Reservation, many attendees in military uniform, flags, quilts and displays of photos, medals, three Native staffs representing three different tribes, and prominent at the front of the room lay Richard in his wooden casket.

The atmosphere, unlike the usual visitation, was less stilted and more relaxed. There was a certain solemnity, but also the casualness of friends and family at an annual reunion. The ceremony was led by Ben Good Buffalo, friend of Richard, with other friends and family members entering in with songs, chants and testimonies to the life of a father, husband, brother, veteran of the U.S. Air Force and long-time friend and teacher to many.

An extraordinary meal followed the service, with traditional fry bread among many other choices. All of this was unique to me, even though I had grown up in a world with three day wakes in the living room of the deceased, including conversation, food, laughter and tears, with an open casket in the living room for all to view. I now wonder how our culture lost the richness of a wake to be replaced by the formality of a visitation.

The most impressive moments for me were when Frank Marshall, veteran service officer for the tribe stood near the casket and called roll call to all of the military, most in uniform and standing in attention in a line at the side of the room. He announced each name in a loud voice, and in an equally strong voice each responded with "Yes, SIR". Finally he called out, "Richard Wendell Galeano." No answer. Again, "Richard Wendell  Galeano." No answer. A third time, "Richard Wendell Galeano."

Vincent Ten Fingers, a Vietnam veteran's strong voice replied, "Not here, SIR. He is with a higher command."

Wednesday, January 7, 2015

Rest in Peace

Richard Galeano died yesterday. He may not be widely known, but to us fighting the battle to save our VA in Hot Springs, he was an inspiration. He showed up early on in the struggle, bravely spoke up in front of friends and foes, and, once again, fought another battle as the faithful soldier he remained all his life.

Richard was among the six veterans that I interviewed for Reveille in Hot Springs: The Battle to Save our VA who have all fought their last battle and are now at peace. I will attend yet another funeral for another veteran who will always remain in my heart, and his testimony in the book will outlast me to enlighten others long into the future.

During his interview he shared his pride in his family's strong military heritage. He and two of his brothers were both in the Air Force during the sixties. Two of his sons served in the U.S. Marine Corps and his third son is in the U.S. Army and received a Bronze Star three times for his service in Iraq.

As his health deteriorated Richard would still appear at all of the meetings for Save our VA that he could possibly attend, accompanied by his oxygen tank. I would look for his wave of acknowledgment when he spotted me in the crowd.

What I will remember best about Richard was his attention to the needs of the Native Americans who used our VA, and his part in establishing the first sweat lodge at our VA to assist these Natives in their recovery.

Toward the end of his life Richard would still conduct some of the sweats at the VA when no one else was available. He had his own sweat lodge at his home in the country where he would welcome all who joined him in prayer.

The following is the last paragraph from his chapter in Reveille in Hot Springs:

You don't have to be a Native American to go through a sweat lodge ceremony. No matter what color, all participants are brother veterans. The Hot Springs VA has shown its uniqueness for all veterans by being the first VA facility to provide a sweat lodge, which helps in the healing of many veterans. The Inipi is located in a peaceful, secluded corner of the VA. Every Friday the smoke can be seen rising from the steam of the heated rocks, carrying the prayers and songs of veterans, with hope and possibilities for renewal and recovery.

Whenever I see smoke I will remember this veteran who recognized the importance of the sweat lodge in the healing of veterans. Long may the smoke rise at our VA!
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
Back to Top