April Rain

All night it came down - that wonderful, wonderful rain! Our winter lacked moisture and, up until now, our Spring was taking us down the path of drought. My thoughts immediately go to the lack of hay for our ranchers, and, especially, to the potential for those dreaded wildfires.

It has been five years since our fire of 7-7-7 that I wrote about in "Cascade of Flames". The past four months I have been writing about the PTSD suffered by many of our veterans. From WWII up to the recent wars, our young men and women return to civilian life with varying degrees of scars they procured during their time of service. I believe that some of the fears they faced will never be totally erased. The WWII veterans, after all of these years, hate to be reminded of "bad memories". Their faces grew dark when recounting some of their experiences. It seems to me that traces of PTSD will remain forever within the recesses of any who have experienced death, killing or destruction in any form. That is one reason why the VA must keep the rural VA hospitals open to assist all veterans from all wars for as long as they need that help.

My experiences in that horrific fire remain with me after five years. I guess that is a form of PTSD. The alarm that automatically emerges from within when I smell smoke, hear the fire alarms, notice the dried grass on our land, or experience the occasional smoke-filled nightmares, may not be as painful as what our veterans have experienced, but at those times of sudden panic and "bad memories", I believe that I have an inkling of what they go through with reminders of their "first kill", the death of a comrade, the tension of constant alert, and the uncertainty and unknown about when, where, or if, they will be deployed.

The death of those close to me will always carry some pain. Through those experiences and other jolts that have occurred in my life, I am grateful for the connection that flows from deep inside to any who weep over their past; the past which may never be completely erased. I am grateful for the rain and for those connections that link us one to the other.