Flat and Proud

"Why are you having breast implants?" The nurse stood at my bedside after my surgery.

I was struggling with the issue since I had initially agreed to have the implants and was still in shock after my double mastectomy.

"I've been wondering that myself," I responded.

I was lying in the hospital bed, feeling alone and confused about taking the implant option. I was still groggy and relying on input from the "experts". Initially I was diagnosed with cancer in my left breast and had agreed to an implant since I was giving public presentations at that time and did not want to be lopsided. During the surgery they discovered cancer in my other breast which resulted in a double mastectomy.

I will always be grateful to that nurse who stood at my bedside and asked that question. She was the only one who challenged my original decision. All other medical or cancer personnel involved encouraged the breast implants, and later, after my decision not to have it, directed me to a store to order "falsies" to enhance my image.

After leaving the hospital and checking out the limitations and discomfort of plastic surgery, my husband and I drove to the suggested store that offered medical supplies for any restorations and was measured for the falsies. I was horrified to learn the cost.

"Medicare will cover everything," I was told.

"So what?  I was going to research this further, especially after another customer stood at the desk requesting a replacement item and was told, "We can't give you one of those. You have to purchase the entire box and Medicare will cover the cost."

My research began and I found inexpensive inserts at Sears. They were not covered by Medicare but I would not be bloating the system by ordering the very expensive inserts from the restorative store. During further investigation I learned about mastectomy swimming suits from Lands End that were far less expensive than those I could order from the store.

I paid out of pocket for everything and felt then, and still do, that I made the right decisions. Within a short time I abandoned the falsies and went flat and proud! Breasts do not define who I am.

Today the CBS Sunday morning show was dedicated to cancer. It covered issues such as research, cures and causes. One segment was of special interest to me. It was the one dealing with women choosing to go flat. So I am not alone. There are other women out there who have made the same choices that I did six years ago.

To make me even more certain, I have since learned that implant surgery is not a "one shot remedy". It is a lifetime of returns to the surgeon with many complications.

I did make the right decision to go flat. I am still me, minus some parts, and I wish I knew the name of that nurse who quietly stood by my hospital bedside and asked me the question that helped save me years of regret.

Whoever and wherever you are, Thank you!